Critical Information

If you are in a situation involving violence or emotional brokenness, safety and healing should be your top priority. It's crucial to have a clear plan of action. Here are steps you can follow. These steps are a framework, but they may need to be adapted to the specific situation.

1. Acknowledge the Danger

  • Trust Your Instincts: If you feel unsafe, you should trust that feeling and not wait for things to escalate.

  • Recognize Abuse: Violence can be physical, emotional, psychological, financial, or sexual. Recognizing the type of abuse is the first step to addressing it.

2. Plan for Immediate Safety

  • Emergency Plan: If there's immediate danger, you should leave the area or the home and find a safe place. If possible, plan in advance by identifying:

    • Safe exits: Know how to leave the house or situation quickly.

    • Safe places: Identify trusted friends, family, or shelters.

  • Pack an Emergency Bag: Include essential documents (ID, financial records, legal documents), clothes, medications, and money. Store it in a safe, easily accessible place.

  • Create a Code Word: Establish a code word or phrase that can be used to signal to friends or family that you’re in danger and need help.

3. Reach Out for Help

  • Call Emergency Services (911 or Local Hotlines): If there’s immediate danger, call the police or a domestic violence hotline. Some hotlines offer confidential assistance and can guide you through the next steps.

  • Confide in Trusted People: Whether it's family, friends, or a mentor, having a support system is critical.

  • Seek Shelter: Many cities have women's shelters that offer safe housing and services to victims of abuse.

  • Consider a Restraining Order: If necessary, seek legal protection against the abuser.

4. Document the Abuse

  • Keep Records: Document any incidents of violence (texts, emails, photos of injuries, etc.). These records can be useful if you decide to pursue legal action.

  • Medical Evidence: If you’re physically harmed, you should visit a doctor or hospital and ask for records to be kept.

5. Develop a Long-term Safety Plan

  • Find Legal Assistance: In cases of ongoing abuse, seeking legal protection (restraining orders, child custody arrangements, etc.) may be necessary.

  • Secure Finances: Separate finances from the abuser if possible, and open a bank account in your name if you don’t already have one. Access to financial resources is critical for independence.

  • Change Passwords and Security Settings: Update social media, email, and bank account passwords to ensure privacy and prevent tracking or manipulation by the abuser.

  • Consider Relocating: If the abuser is persistent, relocating to a new area or city might be necessary for safety.

6. Seek Emotional Support and Healing

  • Counseling or Therapy: Healing from trauma is a process, and professional help can assist in overcoming the emotional and psychological scars caused by abuse.

  • Join Support Groups: Many communities and organizations offer support groups for survivors of domestic violence, which provide encouragement and advice from those with similar experiences.

  • Practice Self-care: Engage in activities that foster emotional healing, whether that’s meditation, journaling, physical exercise, or other healthy outlets.

7. Rebuild and Reclaim Independence

  • Education and Skill Building: Focus on learning new skills or pursuing education that can help her regain financial independence or advance in her career.

  • Reestablish Identity: Many survivors feel a loss of self in abusive relationships. Rebuilding confidence through hobbies, work, and friendships is key to regaining control of her life.

  • Take Time: Healing from abuse is a process that takes time. Have patience and self-compassion.

Important Resources

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline (US): 1-800-799-7233

  • Loveisrespect (for teens and young adults): 1-866-331-9474 or text "LOVEIS" to 22522

  • RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network): 1-800-656-HOPE

Ensuring personal safety and emotional well-being is critical for someone who has experienced violence or trauma.

Transitional Home

One of Mending the Scarred’s goals is to offer transitional housing, providing a secure, temporary home for women seeking to rebuild their lives after trauma.

We recognize the critical need for secure housing and are working to establish this program by first obtaining funds to support these women.

In the meantime, see the information below:

DomesticShelters.org
This platform offers the largest searchable database of domestic violence shelters and programs across the U.S. and Canada.

For more personalized support, you can also dial 2-1-1, United Way's 24-hour crisis line, for a list of available shelters in your area or click on the link below​:

https://www.hfuw.org/housingresources/